Plus size or Big & Tall
we're a size and a half
and what we enjoy
is a good belly-laugh.
humorous one liners
Everything for plus size women and teens, and big and tall men.

Humorous One-Liners [ fat thin food / chocolate related
- we can laugh at ourselves, and big people laugh more anyway ! ]

"He/She's so fat " one liners { Humorous Quotes page )
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He's so fat that : -

The back of his neck looks like a pack of hot dogs.

I had to take a train and two buses just to get on his good side.

When he "hauls ass" he has to make two trips.

They had to grease a door frame and hold a mars bar on the other side to get him through .

Instead of Levi's 501s he wears Levi's 1002s.

When he was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease the doctor gave him 15 years to live

He puts mayo on aspirin

His belt size is "Equator"

His cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.

When God said "Let there be light" he meant him to shift his belly out of the way.

When he goes to the zoo the elephants throw HIM peanuts.

His university graduation picture was an aerial photograph.

His driver's license says "Picture continued on other side."

He can't even jump to a conclusion.

His wife has to iron his trousers on the driveway.

The shadow of his belly weighs 100 pounds.

When his pager goes off people think it's because he's backing up.

When he goes into a restaurant, he looks at the menu and says "okay!"

When he bungee jumps, he brings down the bridge too

She's so fat : -

When she wears a yellow raincoat, people shout "Taxi!"

She put on her lipstick with a paint-roller

When she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!

When she steps on a talking weigh-scale, it says "one at a time, please"

When she lay on the beach sunbathing, Greenpeace tried to push her back in the water

When she weighs herself the scale says "To be continued..."

When she sits on a dime, blood rushes out off Washington's nose!

She was born with a silver shovel in her mouth!

When she walks in front of the T.V. you miss out on 3 commercials!

AT&T gave her two area codes!

People jog around her for exercise!

When she fell and cut herself, gravy poured out

When she ran out into the road in front of me, I tried to swerve round, but ran out of gas

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